So you are tired of the dating game? Tired of failed relationship after failed relationship, swearing off to ever getting married or ever finding that someone who your heart longs for? Are you convinced that your Knight in Shining armor or your Princess somehow lost his/her way to you and is somewhere in the desert or in the middle of the jungle? For sure, that is a discouraging place to be in. Loneliness is a horrible prison to be in. Here are some tips that may help you find the right person and STAY with the right person.
While this may seem like something that you already have done, with no results, or you think it sounds cliché’ and won’t help, it is the MOST important thing that you can do for your love life and your life in general. Friends, there is no mess that is too big for God to clean up. You CANNOT mess up your life to the point that HE can’t clean it up. He is all knowing and all powerful and he LOVES his children. Just as we want our children to make good choices and be happy, so does he. That being said, HIS order and way of doing things is the best way. It is usually NOT the easy way, but it is always the BEST way.
So how do you pray for your love life? Is it “Lord, send me the love of my life NOW!!!” That was my prayer for the longest time. It didn’t work, or rather, it did not work in my time. I was not ready yet to meet him. I still had life experiences that I needed and things that I needed to go through in order to make me grow as a person. Ask the Lord to show you the right person and to guide you in the right way and for the wisdom to know the difference between the right person and the one that looks awfully good in the short term.
2.) Keep Looking, but look for a friend
While this one may seem like common sense, it is very easy to get so discouraged that you stop looking for that special someone entirely! Be open to the possibility of romance, but first look for someone whose company you enjoy. Look for a friend. Look for someone that you can talk to, that makes you happy just by being around, that understands you, someone, that makes you smile and laugh. You are, after all, ultimately looking for someone to spend the rest of your life with, right? You need to be able to be around them for long periods of time. If you find them kinda cute, that does not hurt either.
3.) Go Out and About
If all you do is go to work, run your errands and spend all your evenings and weekends at home, it is going to be very hard to meet anyone, let alone Mr. or Mrs. Right. Find something that gets you out of the house and that you enjoy doing! Go to Football games, if that’s what you’re interested in. Go to church, the gym, join an exercise class, chess club, volunteer, something that you enjoy doing! Even if you do not meet Mr. or Mrs. Right, you will be happier living your own life. Happiness and confidence are very attractive no matter what your body looks like.
4.) Take Care of Yourself
Pay attention to your health, your physical appearance, and your living environment. I realize that everything will not be perfect every day. The mower breaks and the grass gets long, the house gets messy, and there are some weekends that just scream stay home and stay in sweatpants with Netflix. However, if you take care of yourself and your living environment, you will be more at peace, and you will be happier. I have been told that the prettiest make up that any girl can wear is a smile. I think that a smile looks quite attractive on men too. If you take good care of yourself, it screams “I can take care of myself; I can also take care of you. You can depend on me.”
5.) Evaluate your Priorities
Have a list of what are the MOST important things that you are looking for in a spouse, even if that list is a mental one. What are your religious beliefs? How important are they to you? What are your moral values? Do you want children? Do you want someone that stays home while you work and tends to the house? Do you want someone to provide while you stay home? Do you want to balance dual careers? Do you want someone that his honest to a fault? Someone that makes you laugh? Someone that you can talk to? Someone who shares the same interests as you? Have a general idea of what you are looking for. I will say that communication is EXTREMELY important in marriage. Balance out your list with a bit of “wiggle room.” There is no such thing as a perfect person, but knowing which things are the MOST important to you and that you are not willing to compromise on can be a great help in evaluating whether you want to spend your entire life with someone or not.